Tuesday 2nd January 2024

Is always about money.

Even is you hear the opposite

Today I ended up completely exhausted. I've been working with bare one servers setting them up and all that stuff that nobody would like to do as more than 12 hours work for less than $1000.

I just got covered with taxes and a lot of demonstrations of the extreme urgency and the administrative clown-,like liberal unrealistic fried brain "ideas".
Wow... Is amazing. I don't consider myself a winning clown. I've never been.

My thoughts come and go. I see the teenager with a wide smile working while studying at an industrial school. I remember those extra coins with statues of superheroes that I made with mixed and often experimental materials. It also crosses my mind to turn 18 and dedicate myself almost 100% to my girlfriend, friends and work. At the beginning of the new millennium the Orwellian nightmare in politics and society began to wear on me. Something takes me out of my reverie and drags me to the here and now quickly. Maximus and Julia began barking madly in the front yard. I left quickly. Fortunately it is a false alarm. Cats. A soda is already far from what I can spend. I pour tonic in the glass, turn up the music and stretch to relax my muscles.

I put the thirteen hundred pesos that a soda cost out of my mind. While the music wanders between sting and machine head I see the work in soft development and then the raw marketing work as a university student. The laughter is almost spontaneous. again something drags me back to when I started typing this on my cell phone. "Money was never your ultimate goal or your greatest desire. You sought everything that life could offer" Oh. I remember now. It is a nice crop. a distillation between generational trauma and witnessing hostile behavior. It's having lost my dog and not having found anyone who could help him because the soccer world cup stopped the country. many things. a long time. a lot of anger Ironically, I can never see it properly. but it was always about money. At least for the others.

If read to this point. Thanks. Is good to know that you are not alone.

Gotta shake the head and keep working. I'll post this on my blog...